How can we be sensitive towards people with anxiety disorder?
Wednesday, March 31st, 2010 at
3:47 pm
Anxiety Disorder:
How can the rest of us be sensitive to those who have it?
Filed under: Anxiety Attacks
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I think being understanding is the key, but also motivating/supportive. Encourage an anxious person to take gradual steps to overcoming the things that they’re anxious about. Offering to be with them is a great help and can break down the fear of a situation, if someone you trust and get along with does it with you a few times. I think people shouldn’t just agree with the person with anxiety’s negative thoughts to try and protect them or through fear of being rude. Deep down the person probably knows that their fears are irrational, so if you agree with them when you really don’t they’re likely to feel patronised and not trust you. Instead people without anxiety should share their positive coping skills, to enable the person with anxiety to see how emotionally healthy people function and take tips from them.
If the anxiety is around social situations…I try to make myself go to social events that appeal to me but I find it hard when people attempt to try to make me talk in front of big groups. So I’d say that in group situations its better to talk to an anxious person 1-1 first. Once they’re relaxed around one person they’re likely to be relaxed around the rest of the group too and feel more confident. If people push too hard too soon it makes me personally freeze and close up most of the time.
People have a tendancy to dismiss social anxious/shy people as being dull and assume they’re not outgoing because they have nothing to say. I think people can be senstive by giving anxious people time to come out of their shell. By doing so you’ll get to know them properly and also increase their confidence around social interaction as they may have negative thoughts that people won’t like them and this will be proved wrong.
Chuck Norris doesn’t read books, he simply stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
Support them and show them you care, be kind and understanding and do not make them feel even more alienated or depressed. Always be there for them and show them you love them. As an anxiety sufferer I would appreciate all the love and care from those around me. Hope that helps
I suffer from OCD and Extreme anxiety and what I wish people would do more is try to understand the problem and not treat it as a person issue but an actual dissorder. It is painful and watching the things you say around those who suffer might help alot.
just be caring and supportive. That’s all.
Don’t flood them with to many facts at a time. Do not expose them to situations that may hinder their sense of security. Find them a shrink that will give them 40 mg. of valium and 30 mg. of dalmane if your bpd traits ect… like me. I was born drunk and high. My real parents were heroin addicts, or my father is. My real mom I kissed goodbye 6 years ago. She died from a bad liver and using needles in her teens to catch hepatitis. Back to the anxiety issue though. Get them some benzos. But they may not need 40 mg. of valium and 30 mg. of dalmane and two fiorcets just to function like I do. Peace and thanks for a mature question.
Hello!
Excelent question! I have been battling Generalized Anxiety Disorder for 6+ years and i have seen the difficulty people have to relate to me. It is not a question of education, lack of empathy or anything like that but people who have never had an anxiety disorder cannot even imagine what it feels like. Case in point, my mother has the same Disorder as me and has had the problem for 30+ years. Still, when i got sick i had absolutely no idea this is what my mom spoke about. I was really sick with flu-like symptoms, trembling, i couldn’t even sit still to watch a movie and my throat was frozen so i couldn’t swallow. A feeling of doom and desperation settled and depression came after. However, even today my symptoms and those of my mother’s are so different and our overview of the disorder and how to manage it as well that we cannot agree on a lot of things. So, personally, i do not mind when people behave in ways that clearly show lack of care for my condition. I know most people do not understand. And since each person with an anxiety disorder has a different set of symptoms, causes and ideas on treatment, it is hard to generalized but here are some pointers:
1. Do not try to "solve" this person’s problems. Most of our "problems" are not solvable. All we need is a nice ear to listen to us now and then. I had people prescribing me anything from herbal teas to sex on the beach but that only indicated how little they understood. Just listen and try to empathy.
2. Learn about the specific disorder. If you are talking about a family member and/or friend, it would be worthwhile check out some books on the specific disorder. Anxiety disorders are many and varied. People with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder for example, must perform rituals like washing their hands 20 times and hour, to feel okay. On the other hand, i do not have to do anything like that but my symptoms are being tired and having a headache much to often. I also have ocassional nausea and a horrible trembling. So… even when people with OCD has anxiety, their problems are very different from mine. Go to the public library and get some books on the diseas and about people who has it. I wrote "Purring Cat Inside My Chest, My Journey with Generalized Anxiety Disorder" for that purpose exactly.
3. Understand that anxiety disorders can be extremely painful, both physically and mentally. I know plenty of people who are disabled as a result of anxiety and we all heard about people even killing themselves to stop the pain. Knowing this, it is easier to understand why affected people sometimes are irritable, sad or unresponsive. The person might be having horrible flu-like symptoms, or nausea or terrible anguish. We all try to function normally and treatment is out there, but just as diabetics and other chronically sick people who have good days and bad days, we do so as well. Sometimes just getting out of bed is a very painful and emotional endeavor. I cannot tell you how many times i cried my eyes out trying to understan why i had to get out of bed when i was in so much pain.
I hope the above helps. Remember that laughter is the best therapy so if the person is up to it, sit down and remember the good times. A lot of anxious people love pets and feel loved and protected around dogs and cats, so, if you have a pet, bring him/her along.
Thanks for your interest.
Lourdes Belen
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I have anxiety and I take these pills called ‘Kalms’ which work REALY well so perhaps suggest them. I like people being sympathetic towards me when it’s bad but not patronizing when it’s fine. Don’t talk about things that trigger anxiety e.g find out what makes them anxious, like mine is cancer & death. That sets me off. I find it helps whenever somebody mentions death and then one of my friends will MAKE me chant " I do not have cancer and I’m not going to die". So help them forget about their fear so try not to bring anything up that will trigger it.
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